Squirrels, Patterns and Christmas Tree

I sit each morning for quiet time for reading the weekly Bible Lesson, reflecting and writing.  As I sat this morning listening within and quieting mind chatter, just listening, I heard my heart beating, the high-pitched ear ringing, with an occasional musical bell-like tinkling from somewhere deep within my right ear, listening, listening.  I then see two squirrels scampering high up in the pine trees, then a third joining in, chasing, running round and round, up and down, running across the wisteria vines that grow and connect three tall pine trees.  They run like tight-rope walkers with perfect balance, fearlessness and abandon.  No struggle. Complete grace.  Sure-footedness as they run up, down, across, around and around into the patterns of branches up above.
      My thoughts turn to patterns of the vines, patterns of the branches all weaving together, strengthening each other as they intertwine, moving up, connecting and holding those three pine trees together.  I imagine how I would take a picture of this tangled scene of pine trees and wisteria vines in order to capture the beauty of it all. I see myself as I lie down on the ground with camera facing upwards towards the sky.  I center all the vines, branches, and trunk to fit in the camera lense.  I see the wonderful patterns...delightful views of patterns.
    I then think of the magical views I remember seeing while lying beneath brightly lit and decorated, tall, beautiful and fragrant Frazier fir trees from Christmases past.  What a magnificent perspective it is looking up through and into the sparkle and reflections of the multi-colored mini-lights on the shiney ornaments up through the branches circling the trunk with more intricate patterns... lights, branches and pine needles.... all coming together creating a sense within of inexpressible awe for the beauty and feeling the magical enchantment of it all.
     I didn't put up a Christmas tree this year...the first time in my entire life I haven't had a fresh Christmas tree lighting up my living room with a sparkle of joy for those few weeks at Christmas time and that always spoke to me of love, joy, sharing, and beauty.  I understand why I didn't put up a tree this year after returning from a two-week vacation in Florida during the first two weeks of December.  I knew that I wasn't willing to jump into the rush and press of playing catch-up cramming multitudes of activities into my days after enjoying a unique and very special times of quiet reflections that I was able to share with a dear friend on this unique vacation.  I found this picture of the palm tree that awakened a love for and affinity with palm trees and that I so strongly felt while in Florida.  I love discovering how this picture captivates me looking up through the branches from this perspective. Beautiful isn't it?
   That trip to Florida helped me move through this Christmas season in a new way.  It was important for me to move away from expectations to recreate the magic of Christmases past as my family now looks so different from years past.  The hustle and bustle of the season have gone but the love and memories remain. 
     That's what patterns of Christmas trees, branches of palm trees, vines of wysteria all represent to me.  This was my first Christmas in 15 years without my dog Missy sleeping under the Christmas tree.  Oh how she loved to lie under the Christmas tree!  Just looking at her one felt her contentment and peace with sleeping under the decorated tree. Included in this memory with Missy, I see the fire burning in the fireplace, Bill sitting at his desk, mother sitting in her favorite chair, Christmas carols playing.  Beautiful memories.
   Yes, I will put up a Christmas tree again and again, asking for help when I need it, but definitely I intend to have more Christmas trees in my life.  These memories don't feel the same as mind chatter.  This was a healing trip for me, beginning with watching the squirrels, pine trees, vines, palm trees, branches, Christmas trees all dance together in lovely patterns of thought. That is what's so alluring and inviting to see all this with new perspectives, from below looking up rather than straight on.  Exciting and beautiful intricate patterns, designs, colors, highlights.  And if you've never layed beneath a Christmas tree, looking up through the decorated branches, try it. I highly recommend it.  I can't wait until next Christmas to do that once again---but wait, I can close my eyes and I'm there, right now.